Guides to writing an obituary

What to say, what to leave out, and how to get it in front of the people who need to read it. Written for families doing this for the first time.

1. 01How to write an obituaryStart with the facts (name, age, town, date of death), then tell who they were with two or three specific details, list the family, and end with the service and where to send donations. Most obituaries run 200 to 450 words.
2. 02Obituary templatesPick the template by tone and length: traditional for most people, a short notice for the newspaper, celebration of life for a lighter tone, and veteran, faith or young person when that is the heart of the story.
3. 03Obituary examplesHere are six complete sample obituaries, each in a different style, with a note on what makes it work. Every person in them is made up.
4. 04How to write an obituary for your motherWrite the facts in the order readers expect, then spend most of your words on what she was like at home: the phrases, the cooking, the way she showed up. Two sample obituaries and a fill-in template are below.
5. 05How to write an obituary for your fatherLead with the facts, then show him through what he did with his hands, his time and his jokes. Fathers are often described by their jobs; the best obituaries also say how he was on a Saturday.
6. 06How to write an obituary for your husbandKeep it simple: the facts in the first sentence, your life together in a paragraph, one or two things only you would know, then the family and the service. It is fine to ask a son, daughter or friend to type while you talk.
7. 07Short obituary examplesA short obituary gives the name, age, town and date of death, one line about who they were, the closest family and the service. Here are seven examples between 40 and 120 words.
8. 08What to include in an obituary, and what to leave outInclude the name, age, town, date of death, the story of their life, the family and the service. Leave out the full birth date, the mother's maiden name and the home address, which identity thieves look for.
9. 09Obituary wording: "survived by", "preceded in death by" and "in lieu of flowers""Survived by" lists living family, closest first. "Preceded in death by" lists family who died before them. "In lieu of flowers" names where to give instead. Here is how to word each one, with examples.
10. 10How much does a newspaper obituary cost?A newspaper obituary usually costs between about $80 and $500, and more than $1,000 for a long notice in a big-city paper. Price depends on length, photos and the number of days it runs.
11. 11How to post an obituary online for freeYou can post an obituary for free on the funeral home's website, on a free obituary site like ObituaryUS, or on social media. The best plan is one complete page that you share everywhere, so the details live in one place.
12. 12Obituary vs eulogy vs death notice: what's the difference?An obituary is a written life story published for the public. A eulogy is a speech given at the funeral. A death notice is a short paid announcement of the death and the service. They often share facts but are written for different moments.
13. 13QR codes on headstonesA QR code on a headstone links visitors to an online obituary with photos and stories. Check the cemetery's rules first, make the code at least about 1 inch (2.5 cm) wide with strong contrast, and only use a link that will never change.

Looking for a starting point instead? See the six obituary templates or browse quotes and verses for an obituary.